I was a militant collector of the G.I. Joe toys as a kid, as were most of my friends.  Perhaps my experience was an anomaly, but the only I - or any other former collector - saw this movie was for Snake-Eyes and Stormshadow, the ninja brothers fighting on opposite sides of the conflict.  Unfortunately, the film doesn’t have enough of them.  And what little it does have is disappointing.  Okay, so Snake-Eyes has taken a vow of silence, but why does he wear a rubber suit like Batman?  Are the corny flashbacks the best the screenwriters could come up with to give these two history?

Similar questions plague the structuring of the entire story.  Centering the film around a love story between Duke and the Baronness?  Really? 

I know, I know.  No one going to this movie expects a script; they just want good action.  And the film does deliver there.  Just don’t expect good fist-fights or sword-fights between the ninjas.  Instead, expect underwater ship battles and cool planes and soldiers in super-suits leaping over trains and down busy streets.  This action is more of a video game than a film.  But it is sort of fun, despite the laughter coming from the audience throughout most scenes where these poor actors had to talk...